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QR (Quick Response) Codes are a two-dimensional matrix barcode format that were first developed by the Japanese Corporation Denso-Wave for manufacturing. However, because of the speed of reading these types of codes by convential devices, especially cameras, they have come into widespread use in Japan as a way to quickly exchange information. Thanks to the growing popularity of the iPhone and Android phones in the U.S. they are becoming more widespread for use in the west as well!

There are a number of apps both in iTunes and in the Android market that enable the camera to read barcodes. What you may not know is that QR codes are a quickly developing mobile standard that are specifically being taken over for use by mobile smart phones. I know some of my family have already begun using mobile boarding passes for air travel, which incorporate QR Codes. Additionally you can pass contact information, URLs, calendar information, even secure WiFi network access with a QR Code! QR Code reading is even built into many Android devices, allowing for instant browser redirection, instantly calling or emailing a contact, or instantly connecting to a wireless network!

Today, I discovered QR codes, and when I realized their scope, I was astounded. Put a QR Code on business cards so people can import your contact info directly? Absolutely! Get some stickers with your wireless access info and place them on routers? What a great way to securely ensure that everyone can easily get your wireless details without having to look for a post-it somewhere! How about in the real world? Well, this is already being used for coupons, virtual augmentation in magazines, even on outdoor advertisements and store fronts! All you need is a camera and some software to read these things!

Imagine a game that used these codes in real life. Talk about a really great scavenger hunt! Just encode position location information into the QR codes, and when people scan it they can find the next way point. Otherwise they can “collect” goods in a larger role playing game. Because these codes can be read off of screens, they can be generated by computers on the go, no need for stickers!

I just discovered that I can in fact share any contact or calendar information on my phone with my Barcode Scanner app because it will automatically generate a QR code for me. If you do want stickers, though- Moo will make a pack of 90 for you for only $9.99. What an awesome thing!

Looking for my contact information? Find it here: http://bengfort.com/scan/

Want to generate your own QR Codes? Go here: http://zxing.appspot.com/generator/

Want to print some stickers? Use Moo: http://uk.moo.com/en/products/stickers.php

Android App: use Barcode Scanner by Zxing http://code.google.com/p/zxing/wiki/GetTheReader

iPhone App: use Barcodes by Zxing http://itunes.apple.com/app/barcodes/id292197557?mt=8

Here’s a little non-sequitur for you- I’ve decided on a new way to eat oranges. Of course, I’ve done this before when making breakfast or fruit salad, etc, and certainly this is not unique- we’ve all seen this at Eggspectation; but I think this is going to be my thing for eating oranges. So you can see the gallery above, but what I’m going to do is eat my oranges in sliced thirds, peel-less. For the following reasons:

• Less messy than peeling an orange
• Easier to eat
• Tastes better
• No loss of orange like in slices

Weird, I know. But I remember that Dad used to eat apples with peanut butter and a knife- and it just tastes better. You have to have a unique way to eat fruit!

And there you have it- my new thing, eating oranges a little differently.

Well, as you can see above, I have just posted my first ever attempt at a video blog or “vlog”. It’s not great… Pretty much, I look stupid on camera, and I can see why no one takes me seriously, I kind of feel like a buffoon! Most of the vlog is pretty self-explanatory, but I just wanted to share a few comments here below, for those of you that are still interested after 8 minutes! (Only a unique few who have to love me, I’m sure…)

So first off, for those of you who may be on a ship or have a poor internet connection, I’ll get a transcript posted when I see how good YouTube’s machine transcription is. I’m not sure if I’ll add that to the end of this post, as an attachment, or as a separate post. If you have thoughts, let me know in the comments.

Next… I hate Windows Live Movie Maker. This is the software I used to edit the video, and as you can see it did a bad job. What I saw in my little preview video before publishing is not what the final video turned out to be. There were some awkward cuts, etc. I think you know where they were. I originally downloaded it because I thought it could capture from my webcam directly… turns out that was Windows Movie Maker (nee “live”), and the new version no longer does that (just because you’re free, doesn’t mean you should be cheap!).

Then I had some problems after I uploaded it to YouTube, because YouTube tries to re-encode the video. I tried again, and cut it with Adobe Media Encoder to a better format. Still it doesn’t look great on YouTube, so obviously I have some lessons to learn. Unfortunately with a 15 minute encoding time, both from Windows Live Movie Maker and Adobe Media Encoder for an 8 minute video… I’ll pass on doing it again. Lessons learned for next time, right?

So this was my adventure: what I thought would be an hour or two tossing up a video onto the blog turned into 7 hours (1pm to 8pm); seriously I have 200% more respect for vloggers now!

So I’ve started a new hobby, brewing my own beer, and I’ve even started a beer brewing journal: Tipsy Bear Brewmaster Journal to record my (mis) adventures. The journal is not really supposed to be public, although it can be; it sits on my development server- so not a live location. However, I have gotten some interest and comments, so I thought I would repost my Easter brew day adventures on our live blog. The following is from: Easter Brew: Brew Day.

I am now sitting on the couch, drinking a glass of wine, (I’m not sure I could drink beer at this point), and I’m throughly tuckered out. I spent the majority of my day today brewing my first ever beer! But as I sit here relaxing, breathing in the smells of malt, hops, and yeast, I feel like I’ve really achieved something. At the same time, I also feel really tense and nervous, because now I have to sit and wait a month to find out what happened today! (I’m also hoping that the airlock doesn’t explode off the top of my carboy!)

Today was hectic. I actually had a few last minute things to get; I got all of my brew equipment from Homebrew Heaven yesterday, but I left out a few grocery store items like ice and bottled water. I got up bright and early to drink coffee and review some of the technique in How to Brew, but when I leisurely made my way to Safeway to pick up my last minute ingredients, I discovered that their kitchen gadget section didn’t contain a few key things I needed- namely a funnel, a turkey baster (or wine thief), and a giant Pyrex jar! Stunned, I rushed to Target, only to find that it was closed for Easter Sunday. Finally, I had to drive 20 minutes to Walmart- in of itself a soul crushing experience- only to get lost in the store, and wait 30 minutes in a checkout line.

By the time I got home, it was 1 o’clock, and I knew if I didn’t get started, I wouldn’t get done until after dark. So I bravely set up my camera and tripod, and started cleaning the kitchen. The thing about brewing that I took away from How to Brew is that it is most essential to clean and sanitize. In fact, of the 4 hours I spent in the kitchen brewing my Easter Beer- 3 of them were cleaning, and only 1 of them was actually boiling the wort!

Kitchen cleaned, I started sanitizing. After sanitizing, I desperately hoped that no stray bacteria would find its way into the beer. Finally, I started boiling the brew water. Things started well, I got the malt into into the brew with no problems, brought it to a boil, and then added the bittering hops. It was then that disaster struck.

Seriously, I turned my head away for one second. I knew that I had to be vigilant for boiling over until the hot break was reached, but I didn’t think it would happen so fast! As I turned my head away to check the progress of some other sterilization I had going, I heard a dreaded sizzle, and as I looked over, I saw a mountain of foam trying to climb its way out of my brew pot and douse my oven fan!

Bravely, I stabbed my spoon into the pot, and starting blowing with all my might hoping to settle the foam down, which it soon did, but the damage was already done. Here’s the thing about brewing beer- everything is sticky. From the malt to the yeast to the hops, even the powdered malt extract is sticky!  The boil over caused a mess that I couldn’t clean up right that second, and even as I futilely tried to dab with a paper towel, I was basically caramelizing my oven… it would take a scraper to get the resulting residue off.

After the hot break, things went pretty smoothly. I boiled for another 45 minutes, then added the finishing hops with 15 minutes left to go. Unfortunately, the problems weren’t over yet.  Stupidly, I started my yeast way too early, causing the started yeast to settle down before I pitched it into the beer. Then even more stupidly, I added another packet of yeast to my already started yeast, which caused all sorts of craziness. I still pitched the 2 packets of yeast into the beer… I’m seriously hoping the dang thing doesn’t explode!

Finally, I got the beer into the carboy, and under the table to ferment. Since today is Easter, I’m naming my beer my Easter Brew, which is synonymous with first attempt brew, Batch #0001, etc. I seriously have no idea how it is going to turn out. I’m going to post the recipe that I’m using tomorrow… as well as the blank recipe form I created, and my overnight observations. I’m setting my alarm for midnight and 4 am just to check my brew is bubbling!

Lessons learned from day 1:

1. Clean, clean, clean… then sanitize.
2. If you don’t clean it up as soon as it happens, you’ll have a sticky mess.
3. Read more before you start up a month long project.
4. Get started earlier… it takes a while.
5. Learn how to use an airlock… its not mentioned very clearly, and yours keeps popping off the top!
6. Pay attention, the hot boil happens fast!

I’m working on an interesting project– I’m writing programs that convert text to images based on the key strokes. It’s turning up some unusual results! My plan is to create a program that turns 140 characters into an image, so that people can tweet art! Ultimately, I would like to be able to upload a text file and have it turned into a png file, or even better, upload a png file and turn it into text! It’s not really an encryption scheme, since it can be easily deciphered, but I think it might be interesting digital artwork. For instance, Mike and I could upload the source code from our websites and create images from them– unique embodiments of our technical work!

---

I recently read an article on steganography- the art and science of hiding messages inside of images, and it got me to thinking: “what if the message wasn’t hidden in the image,but instead the message defined the image?” Now I’m not the artistic type- the kind of art I am interested in is methodical (read… paint by numbers). But I am a computer scientist, and I know that a color as understood by the computer is a 4 byte unsigned integer that defines an ARGB value (Alpha, Red, Green, Blue), where each byte represents the quantity of each part. I also know that a character like the lower letter case a, is defined by one byte when encoded in UTF-8, which represents a number between 32 and 126. Therefore, 4 characters, like the word duck can actually be translated into a unique ARGB value (or for opaque colors, three characters like the word ben can be translated into an RGB value).

Thus began my experiment. I wanted to see what a translation from text characters to colored pixels would produce, and if potentially there would be meaning in art created algorithmically. The quote above is from an email I sent to Jaci describing on what I was working on. The quote has one unique feature- it is 675 characters long. If you divide 675 by 3 (the number of characters you need to get an RGB value), you get 225 – which is 15 squared. This is perfect for an image of 150 x 150 pixels, where each RGB value makes up a 10 x 10 pixel square (or 100 pixels). Here was my first result:

So when you take the above quote and translate the byte sequence into RGB values, you get this colored, kind of grey, very dark image. The reason for this is because the characters American keyboards use (and we regularly type) range from between 32-126, while colors are defined with values between 0 and 255, where 0 is black, and 255 is white. When you put an RGB value together, the amount of each value determines the color, so (255,0, 0) is red. (0, 0, 0) is black (no color), and (255, 255, 255) is white (all colors). If the values are even, say (64,64,64) you get grey, darker grey is numbers closer to 0 and lighter grey is numbers closer to 255. So because the alphabet we normally use is so close together, and very low numbers- you get a grey, dark image. Especially since the most common character we use is the non-breaking space: ” ” which is 32.

To fix this, I shifted the values for the characters by distributing them evenly across the range 0-255 (for the nerds out there, I used the formula: Math.ceil((charCode – 32) / 94 ) * 255)). This had the effect of spreading the values of characters farther apart, and making them less grey, it also lightens the image, because the top values are closer to white again instead of black, and I got this:

Much, much better! And actually, an interesting result because all the colors are there- reds, greens, blues, yellows- that is what I was hoping for! I was afraid that a direct byte by byte translation would produce uninteresting results (monocolor, shades of the same color, etc.). There were still a lot of greys and whites, and I thought this could be the fault of the most common character, the non breaking space, which my shift gave a value of 0. So I made the non breaking space 255 (all white). This was a failure, because it lightened the image up too much:

I had been hoping that maximizing a color value might make the color more vibrant. But as it turns out, spaces are only one of two other values, that probably are also high. so, instead a 0 value actually makes the other two colors more vibrant, while the the 255 value, just makes things whiter. Blocks might not be the most interesting result, so I tried random scatter of the 1o0 pixels:

But this has a problem, when you inject randomness into the formula, you can’t translate the image back to text. So my original idea of an algorithmically generated piece of art, whose meaning could be read in plain English, would be lost. This image could be translated into any text, not just the paragraph that you read in the beginning. Blocks are boring, so next I tried 100px lines, I hoped that this would give me the fluidity I was looking for:

Alas, it did not, it gave me three columns because 100 is 2/3 of 150, so the images was broken into thirds. I am now currently experimenting with some other manipulations including spirals, alpha gradient overlays, gradients, frequency histograms, etc. If you have any ideas, please comment them, so I can try them out!

So what is the end result? As you read from my paragraph, I’m thinking about making this mainstream by creating a web application for tweets. Of course, now that I’m posting this as a blog, anyone can steal that idea and run with it. Maybe I should grab the domain tweettoart.com! But I’m thinking this could have bigger implications. I also mentioned that I could uniquely turn my web pages into graphics, or even bigger- I could take the entire New York Times website on a particular day and turn it into some sort of graphic! If you have ideas for applications of this, please comment below and let me know!

Also, I’m hoping that using these methods, we could find interesting images, where text can be written specifically to produce an image. Then both the image and the text would have meaning! Imagine creating poetry that designed an image (hint, hint, Devi and Bethany!) That would be really cool.

If you want a copy of the program in its current format to install on your computer (It’s Adobe AIR), so that you can play around… email me or comment below. I’d be happy to share, just keep in mind that it is experimental, so you might be able to break it.

A big thanks to our special guest recipe contributor on Bengfort.com- Ranjana Sharma. Ranjana, or Rani as we call her at school, is a classmate of mine at NDSU. Not only is she a skilled computer scientist, chemist, polymer-magician, teacher, and student, but she is also an amazing cook! This is probably due to the fact that she has over 90 graduate degrees, most of which are chemical related, and she can therefore explain the mysterious molecular magic of masala.

Born in Madhya Pradesh (Central India), she is an expert roti maker. However, as her father was in a transferable job, she didn’t grow up in one place in India. Even though she traveled all over India’s varying cuisine geography, she was delighted to find that our own Guyana Cookbook had such similar recipes to her own “home style” food.

I was super lucky to be assigned the same office as her, because as soon as she discovered the Guyana Cookbook, she was determined to feed me her distinct version of Indian cooking to see how well it compared. After a semester of mostly taco bell, subway, and absolutely nothing spicy in North Dakota, it came as a welcome relief to warm up my frozen, flooded self. For the rest of my time at North Dakota, my classmates and I were treated to feasts that could not be found anywhere else in the Midwest, feasts that were very reminiscent of home.

It is purely my fault, that I haven’t yet asked Rani to contribute to our growing World Cookbook. I’m truly sorry that it has taken this long to get her recipes up. As Ranjana is a strict vegetarian, I’m sure that Jaci especially is going to enjoy these recipes! I’m sure the rest of you will also recognize them as you make them, either from Nanee’s cooking, from Indian restaurants, or from your friend’s Indian cooking. The one distinct thing about them, though, is that they are cooked in a home-style that you probably won’t get elsewhere, and while the dishes are recognizable, the recipes and taste is very unique.

So, Rani has already posted 9 recipes to the blog. They aren’t on the front page, because we posted them under the auspicious date December 19, 2009. However, you can find all her recipes, and future posts under her author page: http://www.bengfort.com/author/ranjana/. (Or by looking up the Indian Cooking Tag, or the World Recipes Category, etc. etc.) I’m pretty sure she is planning on gracing us with more (hopefully). But here are links to the first few:

• Chhole
• Gulab Jamun
• Halwa
• Khatta Aloo
• Masala
• Matar Paneer
• Pao Bhaji
• Rajma
• Shahi Paneer

I know the girls especially are going to be excited by the Gulab Jamun recipe! So these recipes are still a little bare, and are missing pictures and descriptions, but don’t worry, as Ranjana and I cook them, more content will be added. Enjoy!

March at last! My Blackberry has been dying for some time now because it was unable to handle all of the data I loaded on it. Frustratingly, it kept dumping its memory, causing me to lose all my texts, emails, bookmarks, and app data. It was time for a new phone!

Around January, Verizon began sending me upgrade notices so we looked into it, but as it turned out, it wasn’t time for the “New Every Two” upgrade that comes with steep discounts… I had to wait until March for that. Why Verizon kept sending me “You’re eligible for an upgrade” emails and mailers, when I wasn’t eligible until March is a mystery to me. Unfortunately, looking into it made me start coveting the Android mobile operating system from Google, and thanks to some deliciously sci-fi commercials by Verizon, the Motorola Droid in particular.

Verizon’s deceptive upgrade advertising aside, I waited patiently until March, but when the beginning of the month arrived and I didn’t jump at the chance to run to the Verizon store, Jaci began to wonder. I dread going into that store because of the soul crushing customer service I’ve had in the past, which may have explained my reluctance. However, as the Ides passed and my Blackberry complaints became more verbose (and slightly vulgar), Jaci finally confronted me.

I explained that I was now awaiting the release of Google’s Nexus on Verizon. Even though I held no hope of the iPhone on Verizon, Nexus seemed like an Android iPhone killer, whereas Droid had only been doing ok. Google’s phone page said Nexus would be available to Verizon customers in “Spring 2010″. Jaci finally convinced me that waiting would only cost me more frustration, and that since she was also eligible for an upgrade, she would get a Droid as well. I could have held out on my own, but with her mobile life, I knew we needed her phone smart. So we spent the next two hours at the Verizon store, and left with our souls mostly intact, but our wallets lighter.

It was worth it.

Android is an amazing OS, and the phone is solid. In fact, I have written this entire post on my phone in the Android WordPress app! The browser, the screen, and the speed is amazing. Only the keyboard is a bit tough… and my thumbs are hurting from this post, but otherwise, I’m very happy she talked me into this!

In fact, one of the first things I did was design custom wallpaper for our phones. Android wallpaper is 640 x 480. Below are some examples of what I came up with. (Note that these were beginner attempts, and in fact, neither Jaci nor I are using any of the wallpapers!). Here’s the thing- even though you can of course add your own pictures as your iPhone wallpaper, Android is open sourced, so it makes customization seem infinitely possible. I can’t wait to try writing some Android apps!

Anyway, this is a really long post to write on a phone, no matter how amazing it is, so feel free to make comments below!

I’m sitting in my office, staring at my computer, wondering how this outline of a document I just wrote will ever get filled in. The Word file stares back at me, unblinking, unkind, and uncaring. Three weeks ago, in a fit of motivation, I wrote the headings for this document- Introduction, Problem Scope and Motivation, Approach, Approach Evaluation, Conclusion. If that seems non-descriptive, you’re right, and this skeleton of a document is not helping me at all.

My downfall for the past three weeks has not been procrastination or distraction (although I have been battling the two as well), the downfall of this document has been the pseudo-productive task that has driven me away from accomplishing this necessary creative work, but left me feeling satisfied as though I had achieved useful progress. It is only three weeks later that I can see those tasks for what they really were- especially as the glow of the screen shows me my empty document.

It is hard to work at home, I’ve concluded. But I knew that before I undertook my thesis in Arlington instead of Fargo. I moved so that I could be closer to Jaci- and we both knew that I would need a good work environment. So we rented a house with two floors- intending the upper floor to be the work area. A bit optimistically, we thought that separate living and work areas would be better for me to work in because I could “go to work” by going upstairs at 9 and “come home” by coming downstairs at 5.  So far it has been mostly successful, but dog still demands attention, no matter which floor I’m on.

What ends up happening is that I take on tasks that seem productive, short term items that are usually completed quickly. They are errands, server updates, bits of code and script that I want to try out, updates to my resume, searching for a job, etc. They nicely get checked off my to-do list, and when 5 comes along, and Jaci comes home, I’m ready for a seemingly deserved relaxing evening. It is a tyranny that demands my time, and siphons my creative process away from my necessary work.

And as I stare at the shell of the document, it becomes clear, for the first time in my life, I think I have writers block! Too bad it is on something so important. The cursor at the end of the title of this document blinks at me reminding me that it is: “Resource Allocation in Hybrid Wireless Networks; A Proposal for Masters Thesis Work at NDSU”. So dear reader, please any advice you can give on breaking the deadlock would be much appreciated!

Ah, another task to check off my list: “complete blog post about pseudo-productive tasks” … doh.

I present to you now, our Twitter conversation during the Superbowl. Lame you say? Probably, but I have also embedded the Hulu ads that sparked such color commentary, making the twitterathon much more understandable. At the very least, our twitter shame will be kept for posterity, here, in the form of a blog post. Enjoy, and comment!

jacib
@AzmatZahra Solution: www.hulu.com/adzone All of the commercial entertainment without the inconvenience of football interruptions.

AzmatZahra
@jacib Genius!

bbengfort
Superbowl food because I love my wife. Also veggie burgers and wine. http://tweetphoto.com/10733673

The Dockers No Pants Commercial:

jacib
Dear Dockers: No Roman man ever wore pants. Just saying. Now go sell your pants, minus the misogyny, thank you.

bbengfort
@jacib stop ruining my chances for free pants! Men wear pants, dockers will send me a pair. Well, probably not anymore. Should I take so …

jacib
Uh oh, the Dockers site is failing under the onslaught of free-pants seekers. Maybe it should have worn it’s pants, hmmmmm?

jacib
Dang it, in my fervor I made a grammatical error. “Its.” There, now all is right with the world.

bbengfort
@jacib at least you’re battling the server overload for the pants.

jacib
People who wear pants: everyone. People who didn’t: Gladiators. Jesus. Goliath. (All Bible people.) Alexander the Great. Caesar.

Dodge Charger: Because I’m a Man:

bbengfort
Damn you dodge… Don’t you have women on your ad board? You’re killing those of us with wives….

jacib
I may be tweeting a lot. These commercials…it’s like shooting feminist-principle fish in a miniscule pail.

bbengfort
@jacib stupid targeted advertising. For the rest of you only reading the tweets, remember I’m sitting next to her.

FloTv: Injury Report

jacib
“Change out of that skirt, Jason.” Can we at least get NEW ideas on how to exacerbate the differences between the sexes?

bbengfort
A flotv will also get me out of my skirt and into pants? Sweet! Theme anyone?

bbengfort
Ach aye, but what if I want I want to feel the breeze between me balls?

jacib
@bbengfort From personal experience, running in a kilt is fast and comfortable. The garb of warriors, it is.

FloTv: Moments

jacib
See, FLOTV, when you try you can do so much better…that was a great second try! Still, “Jason’s girlfriend removed his spine”?

bbengfort
I love my sisters who aren’t tweeting because “some of us are trying to watch the game!”

devibengfort
we can watch the game guilt free because work and class is canceled tomorrow

devibengfort
@bbengfort we’re eating guacamole and chips… vegetarian and delicious, but not entirely healthy

bbengfort
@devibengfort healthy enough! Nice one, at least the snowpacolypse is good for something!

bbengfort
*urp – jaci just put product naming in context. Flotv and iPad together.

jacib
I can’t take credit…it was in the Jezebel comment party thread. http://jezebel.com/5466226/super-bowl-comment-party

tgjbhanna
@bbengfort real men do not wear pants.

bbengfort
@tgjbhanna I’ll remember that the next time I stay with you….

jacib
Strange, isn’t it, how many made-up rules there are for real men?

devibengfort
I also made a grammatical error. Work and class ARE canceled tomorrow, not is

Motorola: Megan Fox

jacib
And then, Megan Foxx in a bathtub, for the perfect dose of misandry. Men are stupid. Boobs.

bethanini
Real men wear plaid. Also, antifeminist advertising bringing out the “man” in me- at least I can burp and fart freely

jacib
@bethanini Ah ha, the tweeting is addictive…even if you are trying to watch the game! (Though admittedly I’m not.)

[WHOOPS! NCIS commercials don't appear on Hulu because they are CBS commercials!]

devibengfort
And now because of superbowl commercials, I’m going to smack people on a regular basis for a variety of reasons.

bethanini
@jacib Haha well Ben made me feel like I was missing something!

Focus on Family: Tebow

bethanini
Also, the Tebow commercial that aired must not have been the one they were talking about- it really didn’t seem inflammatory to me at all

bethanini
Didn’t even register as anti-abortion. I thought it was just a commercial about Tebow and his family. Silly me.

jacib
@bethanini That was it–it was just the Focus on the Family went subtle (perhaps to make the feminists seem hysterical?).

E*Trade: Milkaholic

jacib
Yes…babies are totally gender-inscribed…baby girls are jealous bitches, baby boys are tiny playas…also, “milkaholic”?

tgjbhanna
@jacib ahh boobs! And babies! Tv has it all!

bbengfort
Just remember it takes tight, spandex PANTS to kick an offsides kick in the third quarter… Bold.

jacib
@bbengfort It could be done in a nice short kilt…hopefully with appropriate underthings, though. Even I am not that progressive.

Census: Snapshot

jacib
Commercials I like count: 1 (census), 2 (Google–so cute!)

Google: Search On

bbengfort
Google… Awwww!

devibengfort
darn, we were wondering what the heck was going on with the census commercial that we didnt even see the google commercial

Kia: Big Game

jacib
Kia–so close! But we had to add girl in bikini, girl in da club…kid toys are so baller.

Doritos: Hands off!

bethanini
Tim’s favorite: Toddler bitch-slapping Mom’s boyfriend, also, Budweiser commercial with Stripes theme music

tgjbhanna
@jacib men have to have rules. It makes the women think they are in control.

bethanini
Of course, Tim missed Megan Fox commercial…

bbengfort
@jacib do you need an O2 tank, my dear, up there on your high horse? (don’t worry, I was given permission to tweet this)

jacib
@devibengfort Check www.hulu.com/adzone…it should post there in time.

jacib
@bethanini Ditto…if you dare! Boobs!

Denny’s: Chicken Warning

bbengfort
Just got confirmation of my free pants entry from dockers. Better get a size up because of my free Grand Slam from Denny’s on Tuesday!

tgjbhanna
@bbengfort trousers not pants. Forever in blue jeans.

jacib
Air Force Reserve commercial loses for being dorky. The military isn’t using it’s resources…

bbengfort
@tgjbhanna wow, I can’t believe you just Britished me! I could go for a pair of khakis, but I am a computer nerd.

sworah
Was there something going on today? I’ve been asleep nearly the whole weekend. Also, Megan Fox is a skanky whore.

bbengfort
@jacib Megan Fox, not Foxx, she’s not a porn star. And she is the next angelina, she already fought alien machines!

bbengfort
@sworah chris! Don’t talk about Megan that way!

jacib
@sworah Is that why I accidently put that extra “x” in her name? Whoops.

bbengfort
@sworah marry Megan, she won’t rip your spine away, forcing you to buy a flotv to get your pants back. I’m sure of it.

Vizio: Foundry

jacib
3 (VIZIO)

bbengfort
@jacib you like the boring commercials. Also, that was a tv, not a cell phone? What the what?

Emerald Nuts + Popsecret = Awesomer

jacib
AWESOME + AWESOME = AWESOMER. AWESOMER = FAIL.

sworah
@bbengfort If I even marry a woman like Megan Fox it would be because I first had a frontal lobotomy.

sworah
@bbengfort Also, I could buy a blow up doll that had more brains and less plastic that Megan Foux

bbengfort
@sworah or because you won the genetic lottery. Can you imagine your kids? Hot, crazy geniuses.

bbengfort
@sworah you could put that doll in a kiln and it wouldn’t be as hot as Megan. For clarification: you genius, her hot, both crazy.

sworah
@bbengfort The problem is, when you combine her IQ and mine in a meaningful way, you get #DIV0! As the result.

devibengfort
@sworah that’s a lot of hate for one person!

Budweiser: Fence

jacib
4 (Budweiser)

bbengfort
@sworah hopefully genetic IQ is a Max function or my kids are screwed.

sworah
@devibengfort the idea of mating with an individual like Megan Fox to me is probably similar to your thoughts of mating with an orangutan.

Bridgestone: Your tires or your life

jacib
5 (NCIS) I knew it was Abby from the moment I saw the boots!

bbengfort
NUTS!!!! Jaci is unavailable Tuesday, who wants to go to Dennys with me?

tgjbhanna
@jacib mom likes bud com. Too

jacib
@sworah Dang, Chris, what are you trying to say about my husband?!? WANNA RUMBLE, BIYOTCH!?!

jacib
It’s a good thing there’s enough football in this commercial program that I can catch up on twitter and the Jezebel comment party…

bbengfort
@jacib wait… What? Did you just say you’re the brains and I’m the Megan? Awesomer.

Audi: Green Police

jacib
(5) Audi

bbengfort
@jacib you’re on 6

jacib
Oops…(6)

tgjbhanna
@bbengfort green police was good!

jacib
@tgjbhanna Agreed.

bbengfort
Now I’m confused, a dodge or a green audi makes me a man? Help, I need a woman to tell me!

bethanini
Yikes…game over! DAGGER

Bud Light: Book Club

bbengfort
Where can I find the hot chick book club with bud light?

jacib
You mean, all I need is beer and men will want to talk about books? So, Plato, Dante, and Billy Shakespeare walk into a bar…

GoDaddy: Spa

bbengfort
@jacib timeout, godaddy doesn’t host us, we have our own server, I just bought our domain registration with them.

jacib
Oh my, GoDaddy. I can’t believe I let my husband use you as our host.

bbengfort
Whoops, I managed to get my tweet out before jaci! Thanks ubertwitter! Sorry to confuse you, twitterverse.

jacib
twitter, honestly, PUT YOUR PANTS ON.

jacib
If I’ve learned anything from SB44, pants solve everything…even giant whales in nets held up by birdies (i.e., twitter overcapacity).

bbengfort
I leave you with this: awesome + awesome = awesomer. Indeed.

jacib
I drive a Dodge Stratus: http://www.nbc.com/saturday-night-live/video/clips/family-dinner/2908 (For those now considering a Dodge Charger.)

jacib
That was my most awesomest Superbowl ever. Thanks, twitter. Goodnight, friends. Let’s do this again, next year.

AzmatZahra
Dear #SuperBowl & #Snowpocalypse, I hate you. Thank you for depleting earth’s best resources, thus my drinking dt pepsi instead of diet coke

sumac715
I checked my phone after the game and I had 55 texts from Twitter and Facebook????

A Factory Tour

Tim and I decided that to deter boredom on a Monday in Arlington while Jaci was at work- we could take a tour of the Boeing plant in Everett. Because of my experience at Porsche in Stuttgart I figured that it would be a PR junket for the company, and probably a large gift shop with very worthless (but expensive) logo gear. Cynical as I may have been, I assumed that at the very least, there might be some good history to learn; and it was a nice day to watch airplanes land and take off at Paine field. Anyway, we both figured it wouldn’t be something Jaci would be interested in- so we may as well check it out since we had the chance. Little did we know that we were in for a very pleasant surprise because the tour was absolutely riveting and educational!

When I looked online for Boeing tours, I discovered that this was actually a premier tourist attraction. I thought that we could probably just show up at the Future of Flight building- a tiny Boeing museum near the main plant, and that we would be able to get in on a simple tour of the grounds. I did not expect that we would need reservations (we did, we almost didn’t get tickets because we called the day before) and that usually the 6 scheduled 90 minute tours would fill up quickly. The tickets got you into the main plant- we were escorted there by bus- and we could see the entire factory floor, plus access to the interactive Boeing experience, and the Stratodeck to observe flight operations at Paine Field! They cost $15.50 a person, twice as much as a movie ticket, but very worth it!

The Largest Building in the World by Volume

Before entering the tour, we were asked by a well armed guard to lock our cell phones, cameras, and any other electronic gear in a rental locker. We weren’t sure if this was to stop industrial espionage, equipment interference, or flashes but the security was very tight. Other restrictions included a height restriction, and advice that if you couldn’t descend and climb 21 steep stairs or walk a kilometer they would have to provide an accessible option apart from the main group. This only made me positive that we were going to see some cool stuff, though!

After a short introductory video, we clambered aboard a very nice, modern coach bus for a short drive from the Future of Flight Building, across an access road that skirted the Paine Field runway, to the main manufacturing building. Along the way we passed dozens of brand new jets parked on the tarmac outside paint hangers and other support and fuel buildings. Soon, though, we were parked in front of a massive hanger door.

If you have ever been down the Mulkiteo Speedway, you will have noticed this humongous  hanger complex that is the largest building in the world by volume. In fact, you could fit all of the Walt Disney World  theme park inside of this building and still have room for an indoor parking lot that could hold 1200 cars! The doors, painted blue with Boeing logos are roughly the size of American football fields- 90 feet high by 300 feet long! It looks big, certainly, but when you are standing, engulfed by those doors, it makes you feel downright Lilliputian!

Assembling Twin-Aisle, Wide Body Aircraft

The tour guide (Paul) led us down into an access tunnel that was a kilometer long- each of the 6 manufacturing bays have one. The tunnel runs pipes, cords, and people safely below the assembly floor- in fact, it is used by Boeing employees for exercise during bad weather! The tunnel was long, well lit, and had a laminated concrete floor. I could just envision all the fun things I could do in that tunnel with roller blades, bikes, moving dollies and a tow rope (or vegetable oil and a mattress)…

Halfway down the tunnel we came to a giant freight elevator that took us to the top floor of the middle of the E-shed. The floor was a visitors lobby with security guards, speakers for the tour guide and an amazing overlook view of the 747-8 Assembly station! Previous, smaller jets like the 727 and 737 had been manufactured by a moving assembly line (picture a giant scaffolding on wheels that grew over an aircraft being assembled as it moved down the assembly floor). Unfortunately the 747 was much to massive to be assembled in this way- so it is assembled in static stations.

In the front bay doors are giant aluminum sheet metal cutters, then stations for wing assembly. Wing skeletons are then connected with their control structures in a wing assembly area. The fuselage also has separate assembly structures running gown the far end of the bay. Then coming back down the other side of the bay all the pieces are put together. First, the central fuselage piece are attached to the wings, then the plane moves forward to a giant oven that cures the sealant. The plane moves forward where the front fuselage and tail pieces are moved by ceiling crane to be affixed the central portion and wings. This assembly area has air wing shaped concrete platforms that perfectly fit the growing aircraft. These structures are also used for access to add wiring and other control and structural elements.

After the main assembly, the landing gear is placed on the aircraft, from which point it moves forward as a single structure. Two more angled parking spots allow the plant workers to add the interior as well as do any testing and structural work that needs to be done. Needless to say, this bay is big enough for 5 747 aircraft lined up from nose to tail with space between! It is a massive scale! Sorry that I don’t have pictures- but again, they wouldn’t allow us to bring the camera on the tour.

A Stunning View

Too soon we were pulled from the overlook to move on with the rest of the tour. 747s are awesome, humongous, recognizable aircraft, and to see their birth was pretty extraordinary. However, as we went back down the tunnel to be transported by the bus to the new hangers, we were in for a similar surprise.

The new hangers were built to create the new 777 and 787 aircraft. As before we were taken to a tunnel to be lifted to the top overlook floor. However, the top overlook floor for the 777 and 787 bays was much, much nicer. Digital TVs, scale models, carpet, and sofas greeted us along with the fabulous view of the future of the airline industry (and its pretty cool present).

If you don’t know too much about the aircraft that carry you when you travel, it may be a surprise to you that there are only really 2 companies that manufacturer your ride- Airbus and Boeing. Boeing aircraft used to be dominant in an airline’s fleet, but Airbus’ sleeker, more efficient planes soon gained a significant market share (think PC vs. Mac). While the 747 had been the workhorse of International Travel – the A340/380 could carry more passengers, farther, for less fuel. Boeing’s answer was the 777.

The 777 is a twin-aisle wide bodied, twin engine aircraft with the farthest range of any commercial aircraft, ever. It is sleek, fuel efficient, and it is the airframe that has carried me back and forth across the Atlantic all except one time. It is an amazing piece of engineering with over 6 million components. In fact the landing gear (seen above) is so high tech, it is the single most expensive component on the plane except for the engines!

We were treated by  a view of the moving assembly line that creates the 777. The line- a scaffold on wheels that grows over aircraft as it is assembled – moves at 1.6 feet per minute and can be accessed by stair by the workers. Once again, overhead cranes carry pieces of the aircraft from their assembly bays to the moving line. We watched as the 35th 777 for Egypt Air was being finalized on the cleanest factory floor I’ve ever seen.

However, the 777 is not the future. The future is Boeing’s 787 Dreamliner aircraft that just had its first flight a few weeks ago.

The Future of Flight

Walking around a partition in the gallery we came to a view of the newest bay that is now being used to assemble the 787 Dreamliner. The 787 is a modern 250 seat aircraft that is made of lightweight, stronger than steel composite material. The modern GE engines are super fuel efficient, and that combined with its light weight gives the 787 an excellent range at highly economic costs.

The stronger material also allows the aircraft to be pressurized at 6000 feet, way more comfortable than the 8000 FAA mandated pressure that is normal now. In addition, the air is humidified, which means no more dry mouth! The composite wings also can bend 12 feet in either direction- meaning that they absorb much of the turbulence! Very soon, airline passengers should be treated to lower cost, way more comfortable flights on these amazing aircraft!

787s are manufactured in a completely new way as well. Parts are no longer manufactured at the Boeing plant, but completed and integrated in specialty plants around the world. They are flown to the Everett plant via the Dreamlifter- a mega lifter created specially by Boeing for the job- essentially a modified 747 whose upper deck has been extended the entire length of the aircraft (it looks like a giant hot dog). The tail is on a giant hinge that can swing out to load entire sections of the 787 at once! Once flown to Everett, the Dreamliner can be assembled at a rate of one aircraft every three days!

To manage the global dispersion of the 787 manufacturing, the newest bay has a modern command center that looks like it belongs in NASA or a SciFi movie! Massive screens track the locations of all the parts as well as the percent completion of every 787 aircraft in production. Reps from every company involved are also forced to man the command center (presumably so that if something goes wrong they can immediately be chewed out!) Manufacturing of the 787 is a modern, technologically, and communication savvy process that is extremely sophisticated and impressive!

A Beautiful Day Watching Air Operations

After the tour, we went back to the Future of Flight museum to look around. We got to play in a real cockpit, design our own aircraft, and experience an interactive tour of the engines. While we were playing like kids in a candy store, we had the misfortune of hearing the massive wind-up of 4 Rolls Royce jet engines that indicated we missed the take off of one of the enormous Dreamlifters. Because of that, though, we discovered that there was an observation deck with a cafe where we could watch the testing air operations for the new aircraft!

The tour was more than I could have expected. Boeing really took care of their guests, providing access without disruption, and allowing complete viewing of the aircraft manufacturing process. The galleries and viewing areas were impeccably designed and furnished, and very comfortable. I could not ask for a better experience in a factory! If you are in Everett, the Boeing Future of Flight Tour is a must see!

More pictures of the day: